A Trip Back in Time – Part 1, 1998

You want to read this post, you really do, it has clips from my music when I was 16, if you think I’m bad now wait till you hear this!!!

We are days away from the album release, I am just waiting for confirmation! In the meantime I am going to put together a few nostalgic posts tracking my progress from a crap musician into whatever it is that I am now (a crap musician with lots of equipment probably).

To start this series of posts off we are heading right back to 1998, oh yes, Tony Blair was the hope of a nation, Oasis were amazing, the millennium dome was going to be incredible, and I had just bought a guitar and a tape recorder. My debut EP “Toxic Jumper – Perspiration Overload” was about to be unleashed upon Peter Symonds College, and bloody hell it was appalling! I have listened to all of it, and really don’t want to play any of it to you. In the end I’ve ignored great tracks like ‘Typical Housewife’ and a cover of Whigfield’s ‘Think Of You’ and opted for a short sequence from the hilarious ‘My Favourite Bands’, a song about rubber bands. Prepare yourself, I mean it.

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“Once I needed something, to erase some pencil, but I didn’t have a rubber only some small lentils” – Lyrics need some work I think.

1998 then saw the release of not only my second, but also my third album. I can honestly say that the phrase ‘quantity over quality’ has NEVER BEEN MORE APPLICABLE. The topically named ‘GCSE.P’ and it’s follow-up ‘Be a Horsey’ (I have no idea) were both equally as terrible as ‘Perspiration Overload’ and so I have neglected to include any clips. Take the clip you heard, multiply by 14 and you have these two albums.

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“I hate Croatians, why do they always fight? It would be better if Whitney Houston was Croatian, because she’s the queen of the night” – Simply finding words that rhymed was apparently enough for me to consider lyrics finished back then.

In the Christmas holiday of 1998 I started recording with Tom Morton of ‘Lardpony’ fame. Under the name ‘Flameboy’ we recorded the tolerance preaching ‘Big Gay Bauble E.P’.

It’s still pretty appalling, there’s no getting away from it, but listen REEEEALLY carefully, there’s some sort of progression here, there is multi-tracking, there are drums (sort of)! You may feel that multiple tracks of my musicianship is just amplifying the pain, but this was pretty cutting edge for us at the time. I still couldn’t sing or play guitar but my eyes had been opened to the joys of owning a four-track. Also, Tom would regularly tell me that my lyrics were crap and force me to think of ones that were marginally less crap. Here’s a clip from ‘Power Cuts Ong’.

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“He brought some candles, which allowed us to see, because we couldn’t turn the lights on, obviously” – Ok, so it’s hardly Shakespeare, but it’s better than my line about the lentils, that’s progress.

That brings us to the end of my most prolific ever year of recording. After this I appear to have taken a break until May 1999, I think the reaction to those initial 3 tapes may have shocked me into actually trying to learn how a guitar worked. You have all that to look forward to in my next post in the lead up to my album release!

Hope you don’t have nightmares, James.

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